She said she liked it better than Pirates of Penzance

This is a C2 post. Opinions are my own.

#C2 for full details please see my disclosure policy

Coming home from martial arts the other night, MapGuy asked if I'd had a good training session.

"I liked it better than Pirates of Penzance" I said. 

He looked at me blankly.

Turns out his aptitude for pop culture references is not as advanced as mine. Shame. 

But the Pretty Woman fans amongst us will know it was a sly way of saying I trained so hard I almost peed my pants.

Last week my friend and I we were talking about me flipping MG to the ground in a take down defence, and kicking butt and I said I was going to try my hardest because "I'm not wearing a sports bra and a liner for nothing!", adding "TENA should sponsor me!". We laughed the way only girlfriends who have both had gigantic babies can.

The last time MapGuy ever hugs me from behind! From standing to flat on the floor in 3 seconds.

So when this info from TENA arrived in my inbox, I thought perhaps my house was bugged, then had a giggle. I didn't PMSL, but if i had of, it would have been OK. 

I have the habit of oversharing. But what happens when I do it, is that most of the time, whoever I'm talking to will chime in with a "me too" story. And you guessed it, needing to wear a liner for sports is almost always a "me too" moment. Despite us all doing pelvic floor exercises, sometimes it still happens. Just look at all those Cross Fit wee photos. 

Most of my mum friends are a tad nervous when it comes to physical activity like jumping or lifting weights. For those who have no idea, and are lucky enough to have no issue, I'm not saying we wet our pants the way a kid does. We're talking droplets.

But those droplets can freak you out and, well, they just feel awful.

So I never go to training without a liner. Screw the stigma. 

Incontinence (yep, I used the real word) is more common than you think, affecting 1 in 3 women and 1

in 10 men within Australia.

TENA has created infographics to help simplify it for us. Because everyone loves an infographic.

See the bit down the bottom? It's only tiny, but it says free samples are available. They'll send you out a pack with a couple different ones to try. Oh, and it's a plain envelope, by the way, so if you're not down with smashing the stigma just yet, that's cool, too! 

Carrot + apple muffins - toddler approved!

Brought to you by Heinz

#S1 For full details please see my disclosure policy

What is with kids and liking food one minute and then acting like it poisonous the next?

It can change from week to week, even hour to hour at my place, and maaan it drives me mental some days. That's why I'm always after easy toddler recipes that hit the toddler food holy grail - delicious, nutritious and toddler approved trifecta!

These muffins are on high rotation at our place and so far they've never been refused! I'm always varying the ingredients slightly. Adding a handful of chopped nuts if they're not going to school, a sprinkle of seeds, a few sultanas here and there, or even adding some honey to make it sweeter when we have some sweet-tooth visitors coming over. But the basic recipe is as follows:

Ingredients
1 medium carrot - skin on, washed
1 small apple - skin on, washed (that's where all the good stuff is!)
2 eggs
1/4 cup oil or melted butter
1 packet of Heinz apple, blueberry and strawberry puree or any flavour you like!
1 cup wholemeal self-raising flour
1/4 cup honey
1/8 cup brown sugar - optional
1/8 cup oats - optional

Preheat your oven to 180C/350F
Grate your carrot and apple in to a mixing bowl, then add eggs, oil, Heinz puree and flour. If you are using honey, nuts, seeds or sultanas, add them in now. Mix until just combined.
Divide the batter evenly between 12 muffin cases
If using, combine brown sugar and oats and sprinkle over the top of each muffin.
Place in the oven for 15 minutes - have a peek at 12 minutes to make sure they're OK.

I like using the pouches of Heinz puree to add different flavours to our muffins to change it up and help prevent Bobbin becoming bored of the food I give her. I like that their apples, pears and peaches come from Goulburn Valley and are steam cooked in country Victoria.

These freeze really well and even though I say they're toddler muffins, I often put a frozen one in Tricky's school lunch box in the morning and it will be thawed by the time he eats it. MG will take one to work... if there are any left.

I like putting these in mini muffin tins sometimes so that they are nice and small for Bobbin to eat in two bites, reducing the chances of crumbs going everywhere. Also it lets her believe she is having two treats. SNEAKY!

For more easy recipes that hit the toddler trifecta, find Heinz and their quality products online and on Facebook.

Gotta love the good stuff

Brought to you by Heinz
#S1 For full details please see my disclosure policy

Growing up, my sister and I were Heinz kids. I have the best memories of eating Heinz pureed apples… wait, what? How can I remember shovelling the good stuff in to my gob, you ask? Well, because we ate what we called “baby apples” well in to our teen years.

Mostly we’d eat it if we had a sore throat or had just had our braces tightened and couldn't stand even the thought of chewing, though there were definitely a few times it ended up in our cupboards just because it was delicious. We’d eat it straight out of the tin with a teaspoon, scraping away to make sure we got every last morsel. There were no fancy pouches back then!

Bobbin is past the baby food stage, but we usually grab some pouches to keep for emergency snacks. I'm one of those mums that scans through the empty pouches because my kid has already eaten it while we've done the rest of the shopping. Here’s a tip: don’t go through self-serve checkouts if you do this - it plays havoc with the scales! I may or may not choose the flavours based on the hope that she might not eat it all and I’ll get her leftovers. C'mon, apple, strawberry and passionfruit? You’d do it, too.

I like to incorporate a pouch of the fruit puree in to pikelets to make an easy, take anywhere snack that Bobbin and I can cook together. Measuring, pouring and stirring not only help kids get interested in the food they are about to eat (making them more likely to eat it), but it’s also a bit of a maths lesson. But mainly, it’s FUN! Making memories, and a little bit of mess, well, that’s the good stuff.

1 cup of SR flour
1 teaspoon of baking powder
1 pouch of Heinz fruit puree in one of their delicious flavours
1 egg – alternatively, you can use Heinz apple puree! Roughly 85g of puree is equivalent to one egg.
Water

Pin me!

Combine the flour, baking powder, Heinz baby food and egg. Stir! If the mixture is a bit thick, add some water a little at a time – the amount will vary depending on which product you use and which age range it is aimed at.

Place heaped teaspoons of batter in to a hot frypan and cook for around 30 seconds each side. You’ll know when it’s time to flip them when the pikelet loses its shine – don’t wait for a million bubbles to form and pop, that’s letting the air out! Fluffy pikelets

Allow them to cool before serving, because duh.

These apparently keep well in an airtight container for a few days, but I wouldn't know because ours are usually eaten within a few minutes, especially when we visit our dairy-free friends.

Being completely honest, I've only tried these with the fruit purees, but a savoury version would probably be yummy, too!

I actually didn't know until recently that most of the ingredients are sourced in Australia – the apples, pears and peaches are from Goulburn Valley, the pumpkins from Victoria, and all the meat is all sourced from Aussie farms. Then it’s turned in to the good stuff in Echuca in Victoria where it’s taste tested daily - *ahem* I'm available for this job, if you’re hiring, Heinz.

For more details, recipes and competitions you can check out Heinz for Baby on Facebook.

Strawberry and Rhubarb Pie in the Cuisine Companion

This is a S3 post - I received a Cuisine Companion for review purposes

For full details please see my disclosure policy

The Cuisine Companion bloggers were challenged to bake on the theme of Spring this month, which is perfect because a) it's spring here, and b) I'm all for seasonal eating, so Strawberry and Rhubarb Pie it is!

There's a few reasons I like to eat with the seasons:

• It's better quality (i.e. more delish)
• It's cheaper (and I'm all about saving money)
• I'm supporting local businesses
• There is a lower carbon footprint getting it to my door

I'm not against buying produce from overseas or out of state if needed (hello, Valencia oranges in Winter), but I do prefer my fruit and veg to have less frequent flier points than me.

I got a whole stack of beautiful fresh, local ingredients delivered to my door for the challenge, and as soon as I saw rhubarb I couldn't go past a pie. Plus we'd just been strawberry picking in Gnangara, and the two are a match made in taste bud heaven.

My family are rather obsessed with rhubarb, and we were even hoping to plant some to harvest in a few years because we go through so much of it.

Strawberry and Rhubarb Pie

Base
240g plain flour
120g soft butter (you can use Nuttelex to create a vegan base)
70ml water
pinch salt

Filling
A bunch of rhubarb, chopped
500g of strawberries, chopped
1 teaspoon of gelatin (you can use agar agar to make a vegan filling)
Optional: 1 tablespoon of sugar/honey/sweetener of your choice (or more if you like - my lot like it really tart!)

Place all the base ingredients in to the Cuisine Companion with the kneading/crushing blade, press pastry program and start. Yep, that's it. When it's finished, ball up the dough in cling film and leave it to firm in the fridge for 15 minutes, clean the bowl, but don't panic about being super thorough.

Chop your rhubarb and strawberries in to 1-2cm pieces and whack them in the bowl with the stirring blade. Set on speed 4, 100C, for 8 minutes. Your kitchen will start smelling amazeballs.

While that's happening, grab your dough out of the fridge and divide it. If you'd like a fully topped pie then use half the mixture, or if you'd like a lattice style pie with a bit of the ol' peekaboo happening, take out 3/4. This will become your base.

Roll out your pastry portion on a floured surface until it's big enough to cover a lightly floured 24cm/9.5inch pie dish. Gently lift the pastry on to the dish and push in to the edges, trimming any overflow. You can put the excess back with the rest of the pastry if you need to, but the more your work the pastry, the less forgiving it becomes.

Blind bake the base using baking paper and ceramic stones or uncooked rice in your oven for 15 minutes at 190C. When done, remove the stones and put aside until it is cooled slightly. If the Great British Bake Off taught me one thing, it's that blind baking helps minimise the chances of a "soggy bottom". Nobody likes a soggy bottom!

When your Cuisine Companion beeps, add your sweetener and the gelatin, set on speed 4, 100C for a further 4 minutes. When finished, pour the mix on to your base.

Roll out your remaining pastry on a floured surface and shape or cut how you'd like it. If you are covering the entire pie make sure to leave a steam hole somewhere or your pie will explode in the oven. It's not pretty. Trying to keep with the spring theme, and also because I'm a bit of a wanker, I used a flower cutter and arranged the blossoms around the edges and worked my way in.

Place in the oven for 20-30 minutes at 190C or until golden.

Allow to cool slightly before serving because the pie filling will be like molten lava at first. Serve with a dollop of vanilla bean icecream and enjoy!

5 Lazy Lunchbox Tips (say organised, it sounds better)

This is a S1 post for Healthy Active Kids

For full details please see my disclosure policy

I have a confession to make: I love packing school lunches.

There. I said it.

I know, I know. I'm a freak. 

I'm a tad obsessed with providing healthy food for my kids, not just because of the nutrition value and fuel for their growing bodies, but because I have such a wacky relationship with food. If it was a Facebook relationship, we'd be "it's complicated". So I strive to create a life where they won't have this; where they won't be screwed up like me. Which is what all my parenting is about, really. Not screwing them up too much. Just enough to be funny.

Naturally, packing a lunchbox lets my little inner, obsessive compulsive health nut come out to play. She's my shoulder angel and tells me to "use more quinoa" and "chia seeds would make an excellent addition to this dish!".

On the opposite side, we have my shoulder devil. The one who says "dude, canteen is open today, have a sleep in and he can order a sausage roll... don't forget the sauce". It is an eternal battle because, well, I'm bone lazy. 

So how is it someone like me can enjoy packing lunches and actually manage to pack a healthy lunchbox every day? By nurturing my lazy side and getting organized. Because I value my sleep ins. 

1. Pack it the night before

After the dishes are done, I immediately dirty some more by making the next day's lunches and popping them in the fridge. Mornings are for rushing around, bleary eyed and telling children to put their shoes on for the FIFTIETH TIME. We use those fancy pants reusable wrappers and have no problem with wraps or bread going stale over night. 

Added bonus: The lunchbox contents stay colder longer because the whole thing has been cold over night.

2. Sandwiches are FABULOUS

I love a good themed lunch, I truly do. And the creations I see all over Instagram? CUUUUTE! I've even been known to attempt a few myself on special occasions. But for school? Every. Single. Day? Nup. Ain't nobody got time fo' that. OK, so some people do have time for that, but if you don't, don't panic! The humble sandwich is the bomb diggety, yo. Or bring out the big guns and put the filling in a wrap. 

3. Fruit is your friend

Bung in a banana or add an apple. If you've got a liquid proof lunchbox and wanna get a bit more fancy, cut up a fruit salad, squeeze some lemon juice over it, and it will keep in the fridge for a few days or anywhere up to a week. Ladle it out in to your containers the night before and off you go. Kid not got a sweet tooth? Cubes of cheese, cherry tomatoes and chunks of cucumber go great with a couple crackers. Takes two minutes and it's colourful, delicious and healthy. 

4. Batch & Freeze

Cook up a storm on the weekend of muffins, healthy brownies, muesli bars, whatever takes your fancy and then freeze them. Just before you walk out the door, grab one of the frozen morning tea treats and chuck it in - it will defrost by 10am on most days, unless you live in Tassie. I pack two lunches a day, so one batch of muffins gets me almost two weeks worth of healthy, homemade recess noms. If you're super lazy/organised, you can pre-make a week's worth of sandwiches (depending on the filling) and freeze them.

Added bonus: Frozen food doubles as a cold pack! Woot! 

5. Wash lunchboxes the minute you get home

On walking through the door, Tricky knows his first job is to take his lunchbox and drink bottle out of his bag and place them on the bench, then hang his bag up on his hook. Look at that, half the job mentioned and I haven't lifted a finger yet. BOOYAH! Empty out any crumbs, rinse it under the tap and wipe down any reusable wrappers. Don't even get a teatowel out, let that sucker drip dry on the dish drainer. 

It's all well and good to be super organized *coughlazycough*, but if your kids won't eat what you have provided you're in a bit of a pickle. Wait, do your kids eat pickles?

The Healthy Active Kids resource, established in 1999 (though it sounds cooler if I say last century) is designed, as the name suggests, to encourage kids to eat healthy and be active. It's a resource for families, with games and recipes, plus lesson plans and worksheets for teachers. In an effort to promote a fit lifestyle, the site has indoor and outdoor game suggestions, as well as ideas for family activities that aren't just sport. Which, phew, because I don't do sport. 

My favourite part is the video section, with segments on how to read a nutrition panel, why we eat what we eat, interviews with athletes from the Australian Institute of Sport, and many more. 

And it's all completely free. Hurrah. 

I'd love to see the site expanded to include a few more recipes (there are only nine), particularly in terms of healthy snacks (for 3:45pm when Tricky swears he is about to starve to death) and, of course, more lunchbox options. Maybe even some colouring in pages and matching activities for the littler kids. As it stands though, it's been incredibly successful with schools reporting 90% of students changed their eating habits for the better after participating. So kudos to them. 

I've got some Healthy Active Kids prize packs to give away, consisting of portion plates, lunchbox stickers and aprons. To win a pack, tell me what you do to encourage your children to be Healthy Active Kids.

How to make sure your white wine is at the right temperature

This is a S3 post - I scored some wine! HUZZAH!!!

For full details please see my disclosure policy

I'm rather partial to a glass of wine. Or two. *ahem*

With dinner, with a cheese platter, in the bath, or even in my study when I'm hiding from my children. There is something about it, possibly the alcohol content, that just makes me relax. Even just holding the glass signals to my brain that it's time to chill out, which is why, through my pregnancies, I was known for drinking water out of a wine glass. Classy!

It is still bloody hot in Perth, to the point where my Dad wants to start a petition for March to be included in summer - yes, let's change the seasons, just for you, dude - and that means people everywhere are still struggling with sub-optimal wine temperatures. It might be a first world problem, but that doesn't make it right to ignore it. Don't be wine-ist.

Did you even know that wine was meant to be drunk at a certain temperature? Me neither, until recently. If it's too cold, then it tastes more acidic and if it's too warm, the lower notes dominate and change the flavour completely. So your favourite Pinot Gris won't taste like your trusty go-to bottle if the temperature is wrong.

WHO KNEW?

So how do you make sure your white wine is being served at the right temperature?

DO:

See the little rectangle? It changes colour!

1. Buy a bottle of award winning Taylors Estate Sauvingnon Blanc or Pinot Gris from Taylors Wines - they have a little temperature sensitive panel printed directly on the label that lets you know when it's perfect to serve! Nifty, huh? But a fancy pants panel means nothing if it isn't good wine... and I'm happy to let you know that after extensive testing - for review purposes, because I take this reviewing stuff totally seriously - that this is goooood wine.

2. Pour a standard glass at a time, even if you have a giant wine glass the size of your head. That way it won't get warm by the time you get to the last sip. If you know you're going to sip it slowly (savouring your only glass for the evening, perhaps), pour less. It goes against my whole being, and possibly my religion, to pour half a drink, but it's better that way.

3. If it's a super hot day, pop a few frozen grapes in to your glass. They won't change the flavour too much, and they won't dilute the wine when they defrost. Also eating them afterwards is nice.

4. Store your wine in the fridge if you can. If it's too far from where you're sitting (I feel your pain, my couch is five metres away and sometimes that is MILES), grab an ice bucket, look fancy and Instagram that shit. If you don't care about looking fancy, grab an esky. 

DON'T:

1. Put ice blocks in your wine. Watery melty wine? Blergh, no thank you! I don't understand why you intentionally dilute your wine, people? Mother, I'm looking at you.

2. Show the colour change panel to your child who will then insist on pouring water over it or sticking his finger over it "just like the change colour cars, mum!". This way you can play with it yourself. 

For more details on the fancy pants temperature indicator check out the YouTube video below.

Cheers!

I went to Sydney and all I got was this AWESOME KITCHEN MACHINE

This is a S3 post - I received a Cuisine Companion for review purposes

For full details please see my disclosure policy

Recently I was asked if I'd like to be one of the first in Australia to try out a new whizz bang kitchen machine. Who me? The one obsessed with kitchen appliances? Sure! Oh, the launch event is in Sydney? Hells yeah, I'll be up for that! An event, a mini holiday, a catch up with friends, and a night in bed without children kicking me in the back? How could I possibly refuse?

And so it came to pass that little ol' me got up at an ungodly hour to catch a flight to the other side of the country. But excited tired and exhausted tired are not one and the same, so I was up and at 'em.

Last Thursday, I, along with 15 other bloggers from all niches all around Australia, walked in to the Sydney Seafood School for our first glimpse of the Tefal Cuisine Companion. I'd Googled it because I am terribly impatient, but I was pumped to see what it could do in front of me. It was so new and shiny that I couldn't resist taking a reflection picture.

Champagne on arrival and through to a lecture theatre with a sleek test kitchen in front of us and screens on the top that showed close ups of the cooking - I felt like I was in the audience of a cooking show. After a demonstration, a taste test (thank you!), and a bit of a question and answer session, it was time to get hands on.

We moved through to the school kitchen... It was like being in Masterchef. Stainless steel appliances, freezer drawers, amazing ingredients, super sharp knives and the best bit, a Tefal Cuisine Companion each to play with.

And play we did. In teams of two we created a main and a dessert - I was with Karen from Yellow Dandy - she made a cheesecake while I made a summer risotto. I'm a hands on learner, so for me it was great to be able to press buttons, insert blades and take the lid on and off for real.
The machine was amazing and it surpassed my (very high) expectations and blew me away. An all-in-one kitchen wonder that lets you prepare meals easily - sometimes with just one touch!

Bloggers clockwise from left: Me, Kristyn from Mummy K, Jules from Zippy Zappy Life, Jess from Essentially Jess, Karen from Yellow Dandy.

We "slaved away over a hot stove" or, more accurately, laughed and joked while we pressed buttons, let the machine do the hard work, and generally pretended we were chefs on a cooking show. When our gourmet meals were cooked, I thought we might go back to the first room to eat them. I was wrong...

We moved to the banquet hall. A flippin' BANQUET HALL! Together we sat down to enjoy our meal in comfort with a glass of wine, friendly chatter, and quite a few Instagrams. We are bloggers, after all.

The awesome table and Jess from Essentially Jess having a taste of cheese cake

I'm very impressed with the machine. I own a competitor product, so of course I can't help but compare, but this has won me over, it's brilliant! I'll be doing a full review post very soon, pointing out my favourite features.

The Tefal Cuisine Companion is available at major electrical stores (think Harvey Norman) for $1699 and comes with scales, a recipe book with one million meal combinations, four blades in a storage container, an apron, a cleaning tool, a silicone spatula and a two year warranty.

If you have any specific questions about the Cuisine Companion or a recipe you'd like me to make in it, please let me know in a comment below as I'll be doing a full twelve month review.

Taking Command-o

This is a S1 post

For full details please see my disclosure policy

The days are quickly ticking past in my self proclaimed year of being good to myself. The #33yearofme. Tick, tick, tick. I've made leeway in to some areas; I bought a chair I'd been wanting for years, started decorating the house a bit, written down something good about every day and placed it in a huge jar, and I've blogged more.

So yay for me.

But, one area I wanted to work on, my health and fitness, has seen no movement at all, quite literally. Because < insert multiple pathetic excuses here > . The only genuine reason I have is my chronic pain condition, but I'm on a new pain management plan now and I haven't felt this pain-free since before Bobbin was born... when I was doing weekly physio sessions, doing mild exercise and eating well. Funny that. Hrmmm. 

I'm not happy that I can't play with the kids like MapGuy can. I'm not happy that I sit out activities because I'm so unfit. I'm not happy that 18 months after throwing out all my "fat clothes" I have had to go and re-buy pants to fit. And I'm not happy that the lifestyle I'm currently living has giant big neon signs along the path saying DIABETES! HEART DISEASE! CANCER!

And yeah, I'm also a bit vain and want to look hot. Type two diabetes isn't known for being sexy.

Rather than just sit around and moan about how I'm not happy, I'm doing something about it. *fist pump*

I'm buying a bike next week so that I can ride to and from school with Tricky. I've been saving up for it for a while now and I'm so excited. But I don't think my motivation levels will just suddenly skyrocket with the purchase of a bike -  evidenced by the fact that so many people have almost brand new bikes sitting in their garages, becoming rather expensive cobweb display systems. I need something more.

I need GetCommandoFit (yep, that hot dude from TV), and a sense of accountability (that means you, internet).

The program started last year with three levels and it wouldn't have suited me then but this is Mission 2 and includes a new starter level, "Get Active", for the first time. It's the one for people like me who might be a bit unco and haven't done anything for a while, plus it doesn't require any equipment which is ace because I don't have any.

It's a 13 week Mission, can be done individually or in a squad, includes meal plans made by a nutritionist, workouts, motivation, an expert health and fitness team, access to the community forums and more. Sadly, no personal visit from the man himself. Sigh.

It starts in FOUR DAYS.

I'm pumped and shit scared. But mostly pumped. I think. Argh!

Wanna join me? You can sign up to GetCommandoFit and we can be motivated, and ever so slightly terrified of that muscle bound hunk, together. But it's all about fitness and nothing to do with what he looks like, OK? NOTHING. Well, it doesn't hurt. Let's just say it's extra motivation and leave it at that.

You in?

The Little Death - Australian film review and giveaway

This is a #S1 sponsored post for Entertainment One and Digital Parents Collective

For full details please see my disclosure policy

This movie opens on a scene of a foot fetish. ABORT! ABORT! NoooOOOoooooo! Panic stations! How was someone like me with a major and completely irrational fear of feet, chosen to review this?

Well, I was told "it's witty and a little bit naughty, and it made me think of you". Little ol' me? Naughty? *ahem* Never! *shifty eyes*

But I pushed through the toe licking because I'd seen the trailer and thought it looked bloody brilliant. You have to check it out below, it is most definitely NSFW in the best possible ways; you've been warned! 

I had never heard of The Little Death before this despite it being released late last year, but it ticked a lot of boxes for me. Australian. Check. Dark humour? Check. Stars Damon Herriman? Check! I love him as an actor, one of my faves for sure, and he doesn't disappoint in this, nominated for the AACTA for Best Lead Actor for his role as Dan. 

The title is explained in the opening credits, which, phew, because I'd never heard of the term before. Spoiler: it's from the French 'la petite mort' and it means orgasm! 

With relationships, love, romance, desperation, taboo and fetishism, it might not be one for a Sunday arvo at Nanna's house - although maybe Gran is in to that sort of thing, who am I to judge? - but I thought it was great and found myself laughing out loud at parts, cringing at some deliciously awkward scenes and empathizing with some of the characters. 

The interpreter scene is hilarious - though it did feel like it was randomly slotted in until a few scenes later when a (somewhat weak) link between the characters is revealed. But I can forgive that because it was so well done. I've signed Auslan for years and I always get a buzz out of seeing it portrayed on screen, so I was a little disappointed to find that the actor who plays Sam is not Deaf. There are Deaf actors out there, it would have been great to see one of them fill the role. But in saying that, kudos to actor T.J. Power because his signs and even the noises he made were so spot on that I believed he was.

I was a little put off by the sexual assault references, and found myself cringing at times, hoping like hell what I thought was about to happen didn't actually happen. Writer and director, Josh Lawson, managed to bring humour to such a serious subject without it being crass, however the scenes could easily be triggering for people who have felt the trauma of sexual assault, so consider that before watching.  

I really enjoyed this film and learned a few things too, like "Dacryphilia", which is achieving arousal when someone is crying. Chopping onions just got sexy.

The Little Death is available to own on DVD and BluRay from JB HiFi or digital download on iTunes. Watch it and realize, in the words of Patrick Brammall (who plays Richard) that "no one's normal. And if you're normal, that's not normal. So just be weird and embrace that."

...GIVEAWAY NOW CLOSED...

I have 15 copies of The Little Death to give away! To enter, tell me in a comment below (or on this Facebook post) what you or someone you know has done/would do to spice up a relationship! The most creative/funny/unusual/surprising answers will win. Full terms and conditions can be found here.

...GIVEAWAY NOW CLOSED...

Glow's Annual Ultimate Christmas Gift Guide - 2014

Brought to you by Nuffnang and BIG W

S1 For full details please see my disclosure policy

I’m making a list (I’m checking it twice?). A Christmas wishlist for the whole family.

Usually I’m a catalogue girl, particularly after being in the BIG W catalogue last year which made my mum think I was a SUPERSTAR. Vast volumes of catalogues are already being shoved in to our letterbox daily. There's so many that the other day while I was hunting through them for presents it took me a full five minutes before I realized I was looking at groceries and oil filters on special. That's five minutes I won't get back.

It’s all just a bit overwhelming this year so most of the time they go straight to the recycling bin. They don’t pass go, they don’t collect $200 and they definitely don’t make it through the front door. But I *ahem* still have last years with my picture in it.

In lieu of said recycling fodder, I’ve been having a play with the BIG W Christmas microsite – it’s a huge digital catalogue that contains everything you could possibly want in one super easy, paperless, searchable, wishlistable format. I just created a new word. You’re welcome.

Related: The more I say “wishlistable”, the more it feels like it’s an obscure eastern European word to be whispered in the ear of a highly attractive man.

I’ve made a few lists of my own (some of which may or may not have been anonymously forwarded to my rellies), and here are my top picks:

I love things that encourage creativity and imagination for little kids. The Micador colour your own rocket or shop is so awesome, if they had an adult sized version I'd buy it for myself. And you can't go past Peppa Pig merchandise. That pint sized feminist icon is an absolute fave for boys and girls alike.

Let it gooooo, let it goooooooooo. You know I still haven't seen the movie? But I somehow know everything about it. Osmosis perhaps? Elsa and Anna costumes aren't just pretty, the imaginative play that dress ups encourage is so important for youngens.

1989 for everyone! But if you don't want to listen to T-Swizzle's sick beats (see what I did there?) then headphones are an ideal pressie for teens - big ones like Dr Dre's or even little earbud ones. It allows the perfect balance: you don't have to hear their music and they can be antisocial. WIN WIN!

OK so it's a bit of a cop out category, it should be called the Glow and MapGuy category. The Ben Elton book is technically on Aunty Penny's wishlist so Ima buy it for her then borrow it when she's done.

Use the filters to narrow down your search by category (fashion, toys, home etc), age, sex and price range to make it more targeted. Although I’d like to have words with whoever did the keywords for it because when I entered Home, Adult, Female, under $50 some of the things that came up were a little off; cat food and laundry detergent? Seriously, you buy me a bulk pack of Friskies, I’m gonna have a hard time resisting the urge to smack you upside the head with one of those little purple cans. Maybe I'm being too harsh; in this season of giving, even crazy cat ladies would love a present.

Share your 2014 Christmas Wishlist via email (or if you want everyone to know what you’re eyeing off, share it on Facebook), then sit back and watch the gift side of Christmas being all wrapped up. Literally. 

What is at the top of your wishlist this year?