No more knock, knock, who's there!

This is a S3 post: I received a complimentary Ring doorbell.

#C2 for full details please see my disclosure policy

It's no secret that I live in a bit of a dodgy area. It's more likely to be mentioned in the news for a stabbing than for the accomplishments of its schools. But as high as it is on the crime-o-meter (that's a thing, right?), I still love my lil house and this street. It just means we take a few extra security measures.

The latest we've adopted is the Ring video doorbell which I had been eyeing off in the catalogues for a while. I thought it would be pretty good, which is why I said yes to a review, but it has actually been even better than predicted, and in unexpected ways!

What does it do?

Well, it's a doorbell that has a camera and microphone inbuilt. When someone presses the button you get the usual ding-dong of a standard bell, but you also get an alert immediately via the app on your Android or Apple phone - open it and voila, you can see and hear who is at your door, and they can hear you, but can't see you (or your pyjamas).

You can also set it up to record whenever it senses movement so it becomes a security camera even when noone presses the bell. Super handy when you're going away and want to keep an eye on your property or, if you do happen to be broken in to, you might actually catch the bugger on video! Alternatively you might just get cool vision of a child patting a dog and go viral. Whatever works for you. It's quite sensitive so I'll reserve the motion sensor function for when we're on holidays.

A great bonus is that you can have it professionally wired to your house, but you don't have to., The internal battery lasts for months and the app actually lets you know how much battery life is left. If you have it turning on all the time with the security sensor, then you might want to think about putting it on the mains, but as a standard video door bell, it hasn't used much of the juice at all. Ours is still running on battery and won't need to be charged for another month or so yet.

So that's all great, and it does what it says it will do, using secure wifi. The kids think it is the bee's knees, I think it's fabulous, and the cop who came to my door the other day because my neighbour had a break in thought it was a great additional step to security, too. But it doesn't stop there...

Unexpected perks

1. Because you can see who it is before you press the answer button, you can choose to not answer. Pretend you're not home if it is someone trying to force their religion down your throat, sell you encyclopedias, or even a family member, up to you. You'll never have to close the door on Aunt Beryl again, because you never have to open it in the first place. Aunt Beryl aside, this is also fabulous for those of us with anxiety who are flooded with a sense of dread whenever the bell rings, not knowing who it is. When you see it's a friend with a box of chocolates, you know to let them in.

2. As the app works wherever you have coverage, I answered the door when I was in Kmart the other day and ACCEPTED A PARCEL! Oh lordy, is there anything worse than finding you've been carded two minutes before you got home? I was able to tell the delivery dude that I couldn't come to the door, but he could leave the parcel. I may have looked like a tool in Kmart, but that's OK, I'm used to that. I could have been on the other side of the door with an infectious illness for all he knew, but no, I was looking at storage solutions.

3, Again, because it is app based and you don't have to be on the other side of the door to use it, I was able to let a friend know I was only a few minutes away when she got to my house before me. I'd popped to the shops for milk thinking I could get back before our visitors arrived, but she was early. Rather than her standing around waiting and repeatedly knocking or having to phone me, straight away she knew I was five minutes away.

Only once did the video get a bit laggy, making the image pixelated (see above) and the audio was crackly, but on further investigation it appeared to be because we were maxing out the wifi with streaming and downloading at the same time. But even with it coming through at a lower quality, I could still see who it was and hear everything that was said.

However, there is one thing I'd like to change if I could. The time it takes for the app to load when the doorbell is pressed. It seems really slooooow. I feel some people might walk away before I've even had the chance to see who it is. The app is 'asleep' to save battery power, and if someone was in a hurry or a courier was ready to card, I reckon you'd end up seeing them getting back in to their van rather than waiting at your door by the time it was up and going.

Overall, I'm quite happy with the Ring. The camera gives a sharp picture, even at night with no external light source (see below), the audio is clear, and the app is very easy to navigate and control. You do have to purchase a subscription to view saved videos (including missed rings), but at $4 per month, that's less than a cup of English Breakfast at the local cafe, so that's OK by me.

The Ring video doorbell is available from stores such as Bunnings, Harvey Norman, and JB Hi-Fi.

Letter to Bobbin - four years old

Hey Bobbin,

Or is it Princess Unicorn Icecream Eyes? Because you've been requesting that I call you that quite a lot lately. You became utterly obsessed with unicorns when we saw a mini unicorn pinata in Kmart months and months ago. It all started there and of course it meant it was the theme for your birthday party today.

We have been counting down the sleeps to this day and you've been telling everyone "It's my birthday tomorrow. Not tomorrow, but tomoooorow." which is how you say anywhere between two and six days. The longer the sound, the longer the time.

You have spent the last year doing weekly kindergym sessions and you are pretty damn good at it. You climb and swing off everything in sight so it was a given, really. But now we've had to move on because you are so bendy that it isn't good for you. People think I'm bendy, then they look at you and their eyes widen. It's tough for you not to overextend, so gymnastics is out, I'm afraid.

But it's OK, because you've joined martial arts! You're a Ninja Ru now, and the fourth and final member of this family to join the dojo. The family that kicks together, sticks together. You're still unsure about it and quite nervous, which really surprised us because you are usually little miss confident. You know all the staff from spending countless hours watching your brother, and yet you were still nervous. It was nice to see, because we were starting to think you'd jump out of a plane without a parachute because you don't seem to be afraid of anything usually.

This confidence will help your chosen career, which for months and months now has been "a police officer who lives here with you". It's never just a police officer. You always add the last bit. So apparently you are never moving out of home. Um, yeah. Let's talk about that when you're older.

I love listening to your little games. You play with all sorts of toys but you centre them around the dollhouse and in my She-Ra's Castle that you have inherited. Sometimes the baby will get picked up by the giant Pokemon, and Wonder Woman will come home from school to pat the pet tiger, and go for a drive in her Monster Truck. The LEGO friends girls are a fave of yours, and you got your very first set today which you built yourself (when Dad and Tricky helped with the instructions).

You are desperate to start kindy next year and are getting so good at writing your name. You're quite flexible with the order the letters go in though! Remix version, perhaps? I wonder how you will go because not long after you turned three, you started screaming and crying whenever I left you at daycare or at pre-kindy. We're talking wrapping yourself around my leg and needing two adults to remove you as you screamed "ONE MORE KISS! ONE MORE HIGH FIVE! MUUUUUM!". You LOVE going and settle in only a few minutes after I leave, but that drop off breaks my heart, and it breaks yours, too. We'll keep practising, munchkin.

You are Queen Bee in most situations and always seem to end up with random children joining in your games and doing everything you say. I can only hope you use this power for good and not evil. I really love watching you negotiate with other Queen Bees, though. Some clashes, some compromise. You are very headstrong, and you are learning to give and take in these situations more and more every day. It's particularly nice when I can be chatting to the other mama and we can watch you both and see this intense relationship tango happening before our eyes.

As we head out of the Threenager and in to the Fantastic Fours (Frustrating Fours?) I wonder what will be in store for you? What will be the next thing that Bobbin conquers?

Have a fantastic year, kiddo,

Love Mama x

Goodnight, sleep tight, stay in your fucking bed tonight

A few months ago I was wondering to myself how long it's been since I've slept through the night...

So I exaggerate slightly. Sue me.

Tricky was never much of a sleeper. He only ever took 40 minute day naps as a baby and toddler, even when he was being worn, in the car, or being pushed in the pram. Over night was better, he would wake to feed every hour or two.

But he was such a chilled out baby and toddler that I could handle the sleep deprivation. He would happily play at my feet if I sat on the couch. He'd drive his cars over me, and I could lay down and play blocks with not much effort if we'd had a particularly wakeful night. There was no school run I had to be up and somewhat dressed for. It was a cruisy existence, even with bags under my eyes.

I was very staunch in my attitude that parenting does not stop at night. If he needed me, he needed me. End of story.

And I still believe this, I do, but throw in another child to be cared for, particularly one who is feisty and has higher demands for attention, a school run to do at 8am, and the days of getting away with four hours of sleep were gone.

Seven years I lasted, and I use the term 'lasted' in it's loosest sense. Seven years of him taking hours to fall asleep and then waking multiple times and being awake for hours every night. He seemed to be fine with little sleep; it hasn't affected his school work or behaviour much at all, but I'm over here with my eyeballs hanging out, desperate for a nap.

We tried reward charts, bribery, punishment, co-sleeping, strict no getting out of bed rules, toys, comforters, relaxation, meditation, music, night lights, you name it. I even shouted at him to stay in his fucking bed. Parent of the year award, right there.

Go the Fuck to Sleep by Adam Mansbach and Ricardo Cortes aka MY PEOPLE

When I finally had enough of living on caffeine and built up resentment, and asked for help we were referred to a paediatric sleep specialist who checked that we were doing everything 'right' first (no screen time before bed, a good bed time routine etc) and got us booked in for a sleep study.

The study showed he has Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) and Periodic Limb Movement Disorder (PLMD) which is the name given to restless legs if it continues after you've fallen asleep. Your legs can move up to five times an hour when you're asleep to be considered OK and the sensors showed that Tricky's legs moved on average TWENTYFIVE TIMES AN HOUR. These little jerking movements were preventing him from going to sleep and then waking him up when he finally drifted off.

She started Tricks on melatonin (much to the chargin of our GP) and it helped him get to sleep, but he didn't stay asleep. A trial of Magnesium showed no improvement, so that's where an iron supplement came in.

A measly 5ml of iron every night is our miracle drug.

I cannot believe it.

Since starting the melatonin and iron, Tricks no longer takes hours to go to sleep and he doesn't wake up all night long. Halle-fuckin'-lujah!

I can put him to bed and go back to check on him ten minutes later to find him fast asleep. THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE. He generally sleeps through the night and if I hear him wake, he takes a sip of water, turns over, farts, whatever it is that he woke for, and GOES BACK TO SLEEP!

I repeat THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE!

He is finally getting the sleep he needs and I'm so happy for him, and you betcha I'm frickin' happy for me, too.

We'll continue the melatonin and iron for three months and then re-asses, and try to wean him off them. But until then, I will rejoice in the glorious hours of unbroken sleep we are now getting and try to catch up on those last seven years.

Finding my Zen (Do Kai)

I don't look like this. At all.

It may go down as yet another thing I've started and never finished (oh, hello half finished coffee table from my woodworking days), or it may turn out to be that I've finally found something to get me moving, but I've started Zen Do Kai.

I hear you. WTF is Zen Do Kai? 

It's mixed martial arts. Bits of lots of styles thrown in together to suit the environment you're in. It started in Australia in the 70s. 

Twice a week I learn how to kick ass. I've been doing this metaphorically for a while (heh), but now it's literal. 

I've been going for about six weeks now and I've learned a whole bunch of moves and sweated from places I didn't even know had sweat glands. 

MapGuy and I joined up together when the dojo that Tricky trains at had a half price special on. MG was looking for a new activity after growing a little bored with squash and when this 50% off deal came up I flicked it through to him via email saying I'd found his new sport. 

He was very in to it and said I should join too.

Which of course, filled me with absolute dread. Sport and Glow do not mix.

Chronic pain, a fucked up brain that always tell me I suck at everything, and I'm gonna sign up for a six month contract? Pffft you're kidding, right? 

I'd already been to one class with a friend a few months prior to see what it was like, and I went so hard trying to keep up with the others, which was a huuuge mistake. I had to come off the mats, and then puked on my way home. Everyone tells me that spewing when you work out is "weakness leaving the body" and I'm all "no, it's my lunch leaving the body". 

But I joined anyway thinking it's six months and let's give it a whirl.

I was absolutely petrified at my first real class. To the point of tearing up. It was a mixed level class so I was in there with a few other beginners but also some people going for black belts. It was super intimidating at first.

Then I met everyone and those huge guys and gals with their green and brown belts that you would not want to cross turned out to be bloody lovely people who would give me hints and tips whenever the poor bastards happened to be paired with the overweight, middle-aged woman shitting her pants.

So I've learned to take some people down and I gotta say, that feels kinda cool. I'm getting stronger slowly, and, um, I'm actually enjoying going. I come home sometimes with bruises, bloody toes, and grazes... but it's really fun being able to beat people up! 

Tricky thinks it's great that his parents are both learning the sport he is dedicated to... and I'm pretty sure he's well chuffed he's an orange belt while we're still white belts. But we're catching up, Tricks! 

Letter to Tricky - seven years old

Hey Dude,

Seven years ago today you made me a mother, and I am so incredibly grateful for that. Here's what has happened with you in the last twelve months (well, the last six, because my memory sucks).

You lost your first tooth! Finally! You were one of the last of your friends to even get a wobble going on, so you were super chuffed when it happened. But then you became really concerned about some random fairy coming in to your room at night. The idea of a tiny person with wings taking your tooth freaked you out, and the notion that she would give you a coin did not ease your worries. 

So I told you that the Tooth Fairy was a thing that parents made up to make their kids brush their teeth, to calm you down. I don't regret telling you that, but then it immediately made you re-question the idea of Santa. For months you'd been asking for explanations on how the big guy in red gets to every house, how he knows who is who, how he knows if you're on holiday etc for months and you weren't satisfied with my "because he's magic" and "the elves help him" explanations. You wanted answers based in physics. 

You turned to me and said "So parents make up Santa, too, right?". I wasn't ready for it, but I told you the truth. That Christmas is magical because we make it magical by being together and loving each other. We both cried. I told you that the job of older kids and adults was to keep the magic alive, and in the months since then you've spoken to your sister about Santa/the Easter Bunny/the Tooth Fairy without skipping a beat, then when she wasn't looking, given me the cheekiest wink. We're in a secret club now, you and me. 

Whilst you enjoyed footy last year, by the end of the season you were very much over it. By chance we saw a display for a local martial arts centre and you wanted to give it a try, and buddy, well, it looks like you found your thing.

You have gone ahead in leaps and bounds. You have gotten so many awards, badges and certificates, because you try SO hard and you're actually pretty damn good at it. Just this week they pulled you aside to test early for your next belt and you flew through. After the ceremony, you'll be an orange belt. Well done!!! But mostly, we can see the incredible difference to your confidence. 

It's not to say there haven't been hiccups in your Zen Do Kai adventures. You absolutely hate some of the warm ups where the instructors are trying to distract you while you have to keep a straight face. It quite often ends in tears before it has even begun because you don't like it when you can't do something. Even when none of the other kids can do it either. You hold yourself to such a high standard even though your dad and I have always said we don't care if you're the best, we only care that you have fun and try. But still you are a perfectionist - and I'm so sorry, because you totally get that from me. 

School continues to be awesome for you, and you have an insatiable desire to learn. Your reading is through the roof, and you are on to novels. The teacher pulled me aside last term to say you are being "extended" now, and I have to tell you, as a child of nerdy parents who signed you up to the library as a baby and have read to you at least three books a day since the day you were born, we were so excited. Just last week you were taken to the other year two class when their teacher was unwell and the children had to read to you! You thought you were hot stuff, and I teared up. Nerd FTW! 

You have a great group of pals there, and it was very hard for you to choose only three to come to your birthday party which will be in a few weeks time. You wanted them all to come, but it's a sleepover and my hard fought for sanity is valuable to me, so I was very firm on the number! It's a gamer sleepover, because you're all about Forza Horizon, Minecraft, Pokemon and all things games. 

Speaking of sleep, you are seeing a paediatric sleep specialist so we can figure out why you don't. Every night it takes you hours to fall asleep, and you wake up multiple times a night and lay awake for hours. I don't know how you function on such little sleep, bud, because I sure don't. We have tried lots of things together to solve this issue; reward charts, co sleeping, not co sleeping, tough love (read: yelling at you), sitting with you until you fall asleep, completely ignoring you, you name it, and nothing has worked. You had a sleep study a few weeks ago, and it was pretty traumatic to be so wired up, but I was so astounded at the way you kept your head still anyway. We'll get the results soon, but in the meantime, you've started on Melatonin with mixed results. So we'll see what happens, and we'll figure it out together. 

You're a lovely kid, Tricks, and I really enjoy seeing the way you're changing and growing up. I love the way you're getting in to singing, writing songs and music. They're usually about love or cars, or the love of cars. Heh. You are either helping your sister and cheering her along or teasing her and correcting her (to which I usually sigh and say "Mate, she's only little, she doesn't know how to spell Koenigsegg yet OK, give her a break". There is no inbetween. Playing 'Danger Devils' nicely or trying to punch her. Asking for two snacks so you can share with her, or dobbing on her for breathing on you wrong. Ahhhh sibling love.

I'm so proud of the clever, funny, confident, caring kiddo you are. Happy birthday, smunchy bum.

Love, Mama x