Friday, January 25, 2013

And then my faith in humanity was restored

If you follow Where's My Glow? on Facebook you'll already know this, so here, look at a picture of a cute puppy instead.

If you don't, or the stupid, incomprehensible Facebook algorithms mean you didn't see it, the other day I shared how disappointed I was at the withdrawal of support for Sydney wedding photographer and personal friend Fe Lumsdaine after she photographed a same sex wedding and shared on her page just how much she loved being part of it.

I wasn't the only one. A number of Fe's friends shared their sentiments on our personal and blog FB pages encouraging those who support marriage equality to support Fe. Well, you lot all came to the party so I wanted to say thanks. If we could group hug right now, I'd be up for it.

Like a lot of people, Fe didn't take too much notice of her numbers... until they started dropping. A few people made no secret of the reasons behind their decision to back out and unlike her page - they were leaving purely because she stated her support of the couple she had photographed and the love that shone between them.

Not the couple in question, obviously - that is from a private collection
Copyright Lumsdaine Photography. Used with permission
I was so sad that a business could suffer for promoting equality. Then sad turned to angry, because, well, let's blame hormones - everyone else does. Who am I kidding? Ignorant twats annoy the shit out of me.

I'm not perfect, you already know that. I'm guilty of being intolerant, too. Normally of dickheads.

When people are being bigoted twats I find it super hard to just shut up and be quiet. The Status Quo doesn't get changed by people sitting on their privileged bottoms with fingers on lips.

You do have a right to your opinion. But when your opinion includes out dated, fear-based stereotypes that go against discrimination legislation then I have a right to not give your opinion any weight (and think you're a douchecanoe at the same time).

It was not long ago, in many parts of the world, that black people were treated like second class citizens and interracial marriages were either frowned upon or illegal. Hell, in Australia, Aboriginals and Torres Straight Islanders weren't even citizens! Less than 50 years ago they were classed under the Flora and Fauna Act. As animals!

Also not the couple in question, but still a lovely photo!
Copyright Lumsdaine Photography. Used with permission

Women had to fight to be allowed to vote, participate in government, own property or have paid employment after they were married. Even rape within marriage wasn't criminalized throughout the country until 1992! 1992!!! New South Wales kicked it off in the early 80s, but it took the rest of the country a whole bloody decade to catch up to the fact that saying "I do" once didn't mean "sure, have your way with me whenever you damn please, even when I say no".

Continued pressure on government changed these attitudes. From being marginalized and ostracized to being considered human beings with human rights (I know it's not perfect still, just look at the gender pay gap and Indigenous health differences, but a hell of a lot has changed). It can be done again. We just have to stand up and be counted.

This story has a happy ending. A lot of you did stand up. The likes on Lumsdaine Photography's Facebook page have increased by almost 35% since the first post went up. What started as fear, hate and bigotry has ended up being a tale of love, equality and support... and being part of it was amazing. You little bloody beauties!

The way I see it, the more people that stand up for equality, be it marriage equality or otherwise, the quicker the law will change. With any luck when Tricky is my age he'll look back and say "I can't believe it wasn't legal to marry someone you love!".

*Not sponsored in any way, shape or form. At all. Not even a promise of super squishy hug the next time I see her... though I'm pretty sure I'll get one anyway!


  1. Agree wholeheartedly. I hope one day my girls look back on this and wonder with total astonishment how this could ever have been an issue.

  2. They'll be embarrassed at how long it took us to figure out human rights.

  3. You do have a right to your opinion. But when your opinion includes out dated, fear-based stereotypes that go against discrimination legislation then I have a right to not give your opinion any weight (and think you're a douchecanoe at the same time).

    This! This Exactly. I couldn't have said it any better.

    It seems like the day for posting about hate on Facebook, I wrote a blog about a very similar thing today (Sorry for blog pimping, but none the less: because of all the awful racism-disguised-as-national-pride that people were posting. I just couldn't abide it.

    I feel for the photographer in that it must have hurt to see her business suffer for something that a few ignorant lamewads couldn't cope with, but right on that she got a happy outcome in the end. Hopefully she gets to be a part of many more happy days filled with love, whatever form that love may come in.

  4. Have I told you lately that I love you?

    I checked out your friends FB page that day, and holy shit has she got talent!

    Numbers are nothing. Having and open mind and heart is everything.

    Good on you Glow for being an awesome friend and sticking up for her.


  5. I'm glad you did your bit to help. You have to wonder about people that would unlike a business because of that. Off to like them now too. Rachel x

  6. Well I now know who I'll be getting to do my wedding photos if my boyfriend of 23 years and I are ever allowed to marry!!

    G. xx

  7. Thank you for sharing this, I didn't see it in my FB feed. Fe has a new liker in me :)

  8. Your friend has a beautiful friend in you.Xx

  9. Kiss-arse post. Go Glow :-)

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  13. Thanks Bree, she's such an amazing photographer :)

  14. I love it when things turn around to happy endings. Wait, not THOSE happy endings... :P Thanks Molly, and great post too x


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